Wednesday, October 20, 2004

Lynching Part 2

November 4th is coming! My next Court date... another nightmare, another horror I am so very scared. I have no Money, NO Lawyer (he remove himself from my case because I ran out of money) and I have NO Justice. I am so scared for my children. In two weeks, I have another date in a court where I can get no justice because I am a black woman. I have a hearing with a judge who is prepared to accept the racially-biased opinion of an unqualified white law guardian and forensic and take my racially mixed three year old son away from me and give custody of him to my husband….a man with a documented history of abusive and neglectful behavior…just because he is white. I have a date in a court where I have spent every bit of money that I have (over $75,000) in the past two years and gone deep into debt trying to defend myself and gain justice to no avail…..where I am now going to be told that I have to defend myself by proxy because I can no longer afford to pay my attorney another $10,000 and I can longer pay thousands of dollars in additional fees for court ordered Forensic evaluations and the services of a Law Guardian who won’t even speak to me or do her job of looking after my son’s welfare. I am scared, bankrupt and nearly out of hope and no one will help me.

I spend every day with my son now like it is our last together. My 9 year old daughter, who refuses to deal with my husband because of his abusive behavior when he lived with us, is depressed and upset at the prospect of losing her brother. I have to look into their eyes every day and tell them that everything will be OK, knowing that it may very well not be….not seeing any way that it will be.

I am an optimistic woman with a strong Faith in God and have never lost my Faith throughout this ordeal that God would find a way to allow justice to prevail….but my Faith is fading. I am fighting an institutionalized racism and bias against black people in a dysfunctional and broken system of justice that I cannot overcome. I need legal representation that I can no longer afford and no one will help me. I am a black woman being virtually lynched by a white judge and his white court appointees against all reason and NOONE will help me. I don’t know where to turn for justice anymore. I am told that I earn too much money to be helped and yet I am nearly bankrupt, I have had my car repossessed, I am on the verge of losing my house and I am being sued by multiple credit card companies because I have had to pay divorce attorney and court fees instead of the money that owe them.

As a naturalized American who came here from Nigeria years ago, I have always had hope and faith in the American system of justice and fairness and opportunity for all and I have had good reason for that faith up until two years ago when my abusive husband, a white man, abandoned me and my daughter and filed for divorce and custody of our young baby son. In spite of all my legal efforts and against all reason and sense of fairness, he has been able to easily manipulate the legal process in Suffolk supreme court and use the strong bias against black people there to all but gain custody of a young child he has no real desire or genuine capability to love and care for as devoted parent. The man can’t even manage giving the child a bath or administering medications properly on the weekends that he now spends with the boy. I am an utterly devoted and doting mother to my son, a child I nearly died giving birth to, and a racially biased judge, law guardian and forensic are about to award custody of him to a man with no qualification or history of success as a parent….solely because he is white and I am black. I am being virtually lynched in this case. I need help.

I am crying out in desperation for help. Everything that is happening to me and my children right now is WRONG and yet it goes on uninterrupted. No one seems to care about any other issue other than whether or not they are getting paid money. It is so hard to believe that what is happening to me right now is actually happening that I feel sometimes like I am living in a nightmare….that I am watching a really bad movie of my life that cannot possibly be real.

I need help. I don’t know who else to ask or where else to turn. I need help from someone who can recognize the injustice of what is happening to me and my children and help me fight for justice. I am almost out of hope. I attended the conference that was held last week concerning the conduct of Matrimonial cases in New York State and was interviewed on camera by some reporters. People in Suffolk County saw me on TV and I am now afraid for my safety. My husband has a history of physical abuse and his live-in girlfriend is a convicted drug felon. I have orders of protection against them both but I am still afraid and so I have moved in with my mother in a neighboring county.

Someone please help me. I am so scared. I am so afraid for my young son’s future and welfare.

Lynching Part 1

Lynching Part 1

I am an African and naturalized American woman living in the predominantly white suburb of East Islip, New York and my divorce from a Caucasian man who physically and emotionally abused me for years and then abandoned me 2 years ago has become a virtual lynching of myself and my two small children.

My husband has used his personal connections within the community and the overwhelming racial bias that exists within the court system and police department here in Suffolk County against black people to successfully put himself in position to gain sole custody of our 3 year old son in spite of the fact that he has a history of abusive, neglectful behavior as a parent and in spite of the fact that all reason and common sense argues against this. Fighting for a fair settlement and a custody arrangement that will protect the health and well-being of my son has been an exercise in futility these past 2 years and it has practically destroyed me. It has cost me my entire life savings, it has cost me my good health and the good health of my children, it has cost me my position as a Senior Systems Analyst for a large Wall Street firm and it has cost me my good credit rating and financial reputation, I am in the process of losing my house and am nearly bankrupt.

I am a college-educated and highly accomplished professional black woman and an utterly doting and loving mother to my two young children. I have no history of parental neglect, behavior problems or unfavorable activity of any kind in my life. And yet…. my husband, an uneducated man , a man who I have repeatedly obtained orders of protection against because of his abuse and threats against me over the years, a man who was arrested just a few months ago for criminally assaulting me, a man who in spite of a court order against it continues to chain-smoke around our 3 year old son during his visitation and aggravate the boy’s asthma, and a man who in spite of a court order against it continues to allow his paramour, a woman with a criminal record involving violence and drug possession, to interact with and even discipline our 3 year old son…. this man has successfully used the racially biased system in Suffolk county to all but win custody of our son. He has convinced a Forensic and Legal Guardian, both Caucasian and both completely unfamiliar with and heavily biased against African and African-American culture and people, to advocate for him gaining sole custody of our mixed-race son. Because of the unchecked and near-absolute power and deference given to these so-called Forensic experts and Legal Guardians in the family court system by Judges and because of a bias that perhaps exists with my the Judge in my case…I am about to lose my son to a man who will not care for and love him and raise him in a healthy way. I have lost practically everything and turned to everyone I can think of within the legal system for help to no avail. I am in such pain and my children are suffering.

As an African I did not grow up familiar with and affected by the evil reality of racial bias and hatred and here in America, I had been very successful professionally and personally up until now in a very white dominated culture and society. So it has never been in my mind-set to see and recognize and acknowledge that such irrational bias and hatred could be behind things that happen to me or effect me. Even when some of my neighbors wrote “WHITE POWER” across the front of my house after my husband left and even when, time after time, a white policeman would show up at my house and refuse to effectively deal with, document or even acknowledge the incidents of abuse against me by my husband, I naively failed to recognize the gradual but inexorable lynching that was taking place against me and my children. I recognize it now, though I don’t understand it and am horrified by it, and I NEED HELP!!